


The Many Uses of Pizza

by FujurPreux



Category: Dresden Files - Jim Butcher, Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Crossover, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-01
Updated: 2012-01-01
Packaged: 2017-11-20 09:50:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/584044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FujurPreux/pseuds/FujurPreux
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack Frost becomes the newest recruit in the Za Lord's Guard. Sort of. Spoilers for the movie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Many Uses of Pizza

As far as winter nights went, this one was particularly nice. Good enough for a walk, even, and thus the Za Lord buttoned up his coat and strode down the street by himself to get the usual payment for his army.

Of course, Harry should've known better than to leave his apartment without expecting some sort of incident. This time, it happened on his way back, while he had his arms full of pizza boxes. A kid---or something that looked like a kid---fell down right next to him, like he'd been flying. Which was probably the plain truth. His hair was white, he held a tall cane in one hand and had a disturbing lack of shoes. The night was nice, but not _that_ nice.

Just what Harry needed, a Winter Faery looking for trouble.

Except...

"Hey, word on the street is that you give free pizza," he said. He sounded quite friendly and he looked eager. More like your regular hyperactive child and less like your regular someone from the Winter Court.

Harry held back his puzzlement and kept his poker face on. "It isn't free. It's---"

"It belongs to the courageous members of the Za Lord's Army!" Toot Toot claimed. They had just gone into the parking lot of Harry's building, and the little pixie had showed up in front of them to defend what was his.

The new guy seemed amused. He raised his hands apologetically. "I was just asking for one slice! That's all!"

Despite being so small himself, Toot Toot still managed to look on him. "Someone your size must eat a lot!" he mumbled, and then turned to Harry. "My liege, permission to chase the unwanted intruder away."

Keeping a poker face was sometimes so difficult with this lot, Harry thought. Yet, he succeeded. For a greater effect, he should've raised his hand as he spoke, but both of his were busy with the pizza. You just couldn't have it all, it seemed. "Wait. We still don't know if he's unwanted yet."

"So I'm an intruder, then," the kid said. He'd been looking from Harry to Toot Toot all the while. He didn't look offended---which was good---and he even made an effort not to laugh. Harry was grateful for that. Toot Toot wouldn't have taken it kindly.

"You heard the Za Lord!" Toot Toot said, batting his wings furiously. He had folded his arms and his face was too close of the newcomer's.

Harry sighed inwardly. He had to stop this before it escalated too far. And without offending anyone.

Faeries.

"What can I call you?" he asked the kid.

The boy put his cane against his shoulder and beamed. "Jack Frost."

Harry's eyes widened. A little. "Really?" Well, that had to be the first confirmed sighting of this one in particular. By a wizard, anyway. He had never asked Bob if Jack Frost existed. As far as priorities went, that one never seemed to come up first. Either way, it had to count like some sort of milestone.

On the other hand, Toot Toot remained unfazed. "That alone doesn't guarantee you a place in my lord's army."

"I don't want to belong to anyone's army," Jack said.

"He could be a freelancer," murmured Harry, whose arms were starting to get tired and who was seeing the several advantages of having such an ally.

Nevertheless, Toot Toot was horrified. "My lord?" he stuttered.

Harry finally let the boxes down on the floor of the parking lot. "These are entirely for you and the troops," he declared. "I'm sure Jackie here and I can reach an agreement that won't hurt ours, my loyal second in command."

Toot Toot managed to look both pleased and suspicious at the same time. "If you say so, my liege." He dived to get his part of the pizza as the rest of the Little Folk came for theirs.

Harry turned to Jack, who was leaning on his cane, apparently amused about everything.

"So..." the wizard began.

"Do I get free pizza?" Jack asked, his eyes twinkling. Literally.

"As I said before, it isn't free."

 

*

 

Some time later, Harry was scaring the crap out of Thomas driving the Blue Beetle at full speed on the snow-covered streets.

"Harry!" Thomas shouted in a tone of voice that conveyed he preferred to chase the evildoers in the car in front of them on foot.

Really, vampires sometimes.

"Don't worry, bro!" he said. "Jack Frost is in my team!"

"What?"

Right on cue, the kid flew by the passenger's window. He saluted Harry and hurried towards the car they chased to put thick frost on its windshield. The resulting crash was a thing of beauty. The car lost control and hit a tree with its rear end. The snow on the tree fell on top of the car like the icing on a cupcake. Get it? Icing.

Chuckling to himself, and ignoring Thomas' glances, Harry parked the Beetle close to the crash. When he and his brother got closer, Jack was busy writing "No one escapes the Za Lord's wrath" on the windshield with frost, complete with an angry face drawn right bellow the word 'wrath'.

Harry saluted. "That'd be all, Mr. Frost. I thank you for your assistance."

Jack stood up on the car's hood and bowed theatrically. "Always a pleasure," he said before he flew away.

"One of these days," Thomas began, "I'm going to find out how you do it."

Harry smiled broadly. "I am made of charisma."

"In your dreams."

"Funny you say that. I'm thinking of recruiting the Sandman. Jackie said he's quite good with the whips."

"I didn't know you were into S&M, Harry."

"Screw yourself," Harry replied without losing the business tone.

Thomas grinned. "Gladly."

From then on, they both worked in comfortable, friendly silence, picking up the thugs and tying them up to get to the next part of the investigation. Meanwhile, Harry thought that maybe he should write a book about the many uses of pizza. But in the end, he decided against it. There was a reason wizards didn't reveal their secrets, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea that Jack had been wanting to ask Dresden for pizza for a while, but he couldn't, because the wizard couldn't see him. And then he could. And then this happened. :p


End file.
